Families and Parents


5
Nov 10

THE MARRIAGE AND FAMILY ROUNDABOUT

jacqueline tomlins and sarah nichols

Go travelling abroad and it’s a case of now we’re married, now we’re not.

‘FILL out one form per family please, for transit through LAX.”

I roll my eyes at Sarah and take the form from the steward. There’s nothing like international travel for defining who you are: nationality, place of residence, marital status. For most people, ticking these boxes is unproblematic; for us, it’s a different story. ”Family?” I say to the steward. ”We’re a same-sex family – two mums, three kids, married some places, not others – one form or two?”

Read the rest of this great piece from Jacqueline Tomlins in the Sydney Morning Herald here


24
Oct 10

IT GETS BETTER

You may have already heard of this effort of videos and messages “It Gets Better” to get word to gay and lesbian and transgender teens that life gets better – and they should hang on in, no matter how bad it feels on one given day or in one given place.

Here’s a great video from Google employees about all of that, and you can watch other people like Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton too.

That’s what this blog is all about – helping to make life better. So that whether you are persecuted, or simply lonely, annoyed or under attack – you know through this blog that there are places where equality does exist. That there are millions of people who support you and these ideas.

It Does Get Better – I wouldn’t be here maintaining this blog if it didn’t.

Continue reading →


16
Sep 10

MAGIC NUMBERS: 2/3, 67%, 2 TO 1

Heather, Esther Kraft and Kathryn Kraft

Heather, Esther Kraft and Kathryn Kraft / photo Heather Kraft

Two stories today made me firm up my view of what the magic number of support is. If we can get 2 out 3 people to solidly support marriage equality I think that two-thirds support is when social change has been achieved. Most politicians would be thrilled with 55% support, but then they don’t tend to last more than a few years. We want equality to last forever, and we want it to be very hard to undo.

2/3, 67% tends to be the special majority parliaments and organisations need to change their constitution.  It also means one has at least twice as many supporters as opponents.

Which stories made me think of this? News that 67% of Irish people support marriage equality (a huge turnaround for a long heavily Catholic country) and the news that 68% of Americans think that gays and lesbians can form families or that a same sex couple is a family (sadly 30% includes pets but not gays in their definition of family)


8
Sep 10

THE VOICES OF CHILDREN

Children speak out on marriage equality

We often hear about the fact that more lesbians and gays are raising children – from their same sex relationships or from earlier ones.

But as one participant in a new Irish study says: “Everyone talks about us, but no-one ASKS US!” what it is like to be in such a family. The people making laws about them in particular fail to ask these questions.

So that is exactly what Marriage Equality Ireland did: interviewed children from 12 families headed by same sex couples.

The report also details incidents of everyday homophobia, in particular the policy of some schools who will not allow sick children go home with their non-biological parent, and how children act in their daily life:

“They’ve always been my moms … me calling (name) my mother’s partner is sort of a really
bizarre thing in my head. It’s just my mum and my mum. And it’s differentiating between them is like: mum 1 and mum 2, mum A and mum B, or nonbiological and biological mother; but it’s just mum and mum …”

Ireland recently passed a law allowing for civil partnerships but not full marriage equality.


14
Aug 10

SPELLING IT OUT

Tori Spelling and son

Tori Spelling and son pose for NOH8 campaign

I’ve never given much thought to Tori Spelling’s world philosophy.  But after reading about the Beverly Hills 90210 star’s views on marriage today, I am sorry I didn’t give her time or credit earlier:

‘The good news is that things are changing, generationally. My kids will grow up in a house knowing that it’s perfectly normal for two men to be in love, it’s perfectly normal for two women to be in love.

‘My kids will grow up knowing it’s all about love. It doesn’t matter who you’re with and everyone should have that experience.’


2
Aug 10

MODERN FAMILY WEDDING ON WAY

the stars of Modern Family, a US TV show

Here’s one for US TV fans … Modern Family star Eric Stonestreet reckons “there is no doubt” that the Emmy-nominated comedy show will marry up the gay dad stars Cameron and Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson).


26
Jul 10

MAKE MY DAUGHTER EQUAL!

the family from Wollongong fighting to make both daughthers equal

My name is Evelyn. I live in Wollongong about 90 minutes south of Sydney. I’ve been married to Peter for 36 years and we have two daughters, Emily, 31, a lawyer and Sarah, 25, an accountant.

I grew up in England, and emigrated to Australia in 1973. I met my husband in 1968 while studying for a degree in Biological Sciences at university in the UK. I wanted to teach, so I completed a Diploma of Education in primary school teaching and taught in the north of England and in London for a year before making the move to Australia. We were among the last of those who were known as ‘ten pound Poms’, as that was the price we paid for the flight from England.  We came to Australia to join my parents and sisters who had emigrated here in 1971.

Peter and I had very simple wedding with family and the few friends that we’d made in the 11 months since our arrival in Australia. In was in a church (like everyone did in those days) in Wollongong, with a Pizza Hut shaped roof and the minister was happy for me to omit the ‘obey’ in the ceremony! I travelled to the church in my sister’s orange Datsun 120Y, with a plastic hand-held fan to stop my make-up melting in the heat! The reception that followed was in my parents’ rumpus room!

Peter and I like to think of our family as a very close one…. Continue reading →


25
Jul 10

HERO: PFLAG MUM SHELLEY ARGENT

Watch or read the transcript of this great Australian TV programme about equality activist Shelley Argent, from Queensland, Australia.

I grew up in rural Australia myself – it takes guts to do what Shelley is doing. And she doesn’t step back fighting for full marriage equality either.

Continue reading →


25
Jul 10

ACTOR AND HUSBAND ADOPT SON

This is part of what marriage equality is all about – building strong families.

Click here to read about Alec Mapa and his husband’s adoption.  Or as Mapa put it on US talk show ‘The View,’ “We became foster adopt parents this year. My husband’s white, my son’s black, I’m Asian … we look like the last two minutes of It’s A Small World!”

As you might have guessed Alec Mapa is hilarious with a capital H on this video!


23
Jul 10

WHY DO SO MANY AMERICANS OPPOSE GAY MARRIAGE?

Jonathan Rauch the writer

Ìn this essay/speech Jonathan Rauch, the great writer on marriage equality, looks at what precisely makes the idea and the movement behind it so controversial. Well worth reading in my view